Have you ever broken up with someone by just not talking to them? Days turn into weeks that turn into months and before you know it, just the thought of seeing him/her again fills you with anxiety? That’s how I felt about this post.
The first thing I did was read my last post.
Secondly, I had to return to my couch and have a drink and wrap my head around all the updating necessary.
Alas, the prodigal blogger returns…
After an interesting 1st season back in American Little League baseball, Chase’s baseball team the Texas Rangers ended up in the Final 4. All in all, he ended up having a great season and growing into an amazing 1st baseman. We never thought Chase would have a season when his fielding surpassed his batting but that’s exactly what happened. He did hit a home run over the fence and Cliff and I were so happy for him to have his moment. There was one evening that felt a lot like an episode of “Intervention“. We were talking about the stress of being at bat and it suddenly dawned on me: Chase was terrified of disappointing everyone. He knows everyone expects him to hit it out of the park every time and that pressure was just crushing him. We screamed and cried and hugged it out. It just takes time.
After all the applications and interviews, Chase will be attending Woodward Academy in the Fall of 2013. I truly believe it is God’s will. There are too many factors to mention that lead me to feel this way. We couldn’t be happier. I admire Chase’s ability to go through so many transitions in such a short time. His last days at Holy Innocents’ Episcopal School were sad for him. I think it finally hit him that he was leaving all these kids he’s known (some of them since 3 years old). As I watched him leaf through his old and new annuals, talking about this person and that, I realized this was his way of coping with his feelings. Even though he may not see them anymore, he would always have this book of faces to remember them by. By the time the 5th Grade Moving On Chapel arrived, I saw a boy who was committed to his decisions and at peace.
July 10th 2013: Chase is in week 2 at Camp Kieve having a great time. Cliff goes up on the 20th to bring him home. I promised Chase if he got accepted to a new school, I would redecorate his room.
April marked the 1st anniversary of Mom’s passing. About 2 weeks beforehand I was having a really rough time emotionally and decided to see an empath. During my session, I was able to communicate with my mom and get some closure over some things. The empath was also able to give me some reassurances regarding what I was going through and what lay ahead of me. Knowing we were going to mom’s anniversary service, I felt very strongly about wearing a Hanbok (Korean traditional dress) to the service. Neither of my sisters felt the same no matter how much I tried to convince them… but at the VERY last minute, they broke down!
It made me feel so good that they did this. I know mom was smiling.
I know the last few posts have been at times harsh. Especially about some members of my family. My poor sister Mary has been the glue holding us all together. Of course, while we were all together, Mary took the opportunity to force Bess and myself to have a heart to heart. We screamed, cried and hugged it out. Why is it so hard to share our feelings? Is stubbornness one of the Deadly Sins because if it isn’t it really should be. There was a time when Bess and I were absolute best friends and I remember thinking just how lucky I am to be able to call my sister ”best friend”! I miss that girl. I am grateful to Mary for doing God’s work and the work mom would want to be done. After all that yelling and crying, I hope Bess truly understands that I forgive her, love her, and support her. Life is too short.
My dad is still seeing the same lady. We have still not officially met her. Fortunately, he hasn’t run off and eloped with her. We have continued to extol the virtues of “dating around”, “just dating” and “not getting too serious”. He seems to be in his own groove and I am honestly happy that he has found happiness with someone.
Cliff, Chase and I continue everyday to remind ourselves we are no longer in Tokyo. Just recently, Cliff and I took MARTA (public train transport in Atlanta) to see what it would be like for Chase if he commutes to school that way:
It’s amazing to me how even in the short time we were in Tokyo, we made such unforgettable friends. Even today, not a day goes by when I don’t think about the friends I left behind.
On a positive note, I did realize today, one thing that has changed since we moved back is I don’t have to blog alone anymore:
Until next time…
July 20th Cliff & Chase come home from Maine
July 29th Ryosuke & his mom (Mami) arrive from Tokyo for visit
August 12th First Day of School